Good Hair, Bad Hair

Sometimes I feel like woman can’t catch a break. If it’s not our weight, its our look. If it’s not our look, it’s our beauty. And if it’s not our beauty it’s our mannerisms in a relationship. Can we live in peace? Geez!

Yesterday a very good friend of mines asked me for my opinion on hair, as well as a comment she made to a woman in reference to her hair. Well, you know how that ended. The I-word was thrown (ignorant). Yep, she totally took it wrong.

Ever since Chris Rock’s documentary on hair debuted, women all across the world, including men, have been sensitive, opinionated, and down right enthused on the subject of hair. More so trying to define what’s good, and what’s bad.


Before I dive in I want to say that the subject of hair reminds me of the story I was told or heard as a little girl. The story is about a beautiful woman who was envied by the local girls of her town because she had Long hair. I don’t remember the name of it, but the beautiful woman happened to land the interest of the most eligible bachelor in her town. Everyone wanted him. These two sisters who envied her was convinced that the guy loved her for her long hair. So they plotted to cut it all off in the name of their envy with assurance that he’ll no longer love her. To make a long story short, the two sisters did as they planned and left the woman devastated. Her, herself, with her eyes welded with tears looked at the man she loved and said, “How can you love me now? I’m no longer beautiful.” The man wiped her tears and looked back at her and said, “I never loved you for your hair, and you’re beautiful now more than ever.”

Years ago long hair was “good” hair, now it’s texture. The topic of hair has gotten so far-fetched that it’s actually quite annoying. It targets a specific race and it also robs a woman of free expression. My girlfriend asked me to write this given her experience and I’m going keep this short. Hair, just like the clothes you wear is dependent upon your free choice of style, wear, and expression. Therefore, as we are all different, everyone will have an opinion.

Society has once again taken it upon themselves to tell “us” whats good or bad, robbing us from our own independent thinking.

To me, hair is hair. And just in the story, I will be with a man who loves me not for my hair, but for me.

Many women are sensitive to the subject because they are defining themselves by their hair. I’m not going to lie. My hair gives me confidence and I feel like a new woman every time its done. But, Sarah Lee’s hair does not run the show; I do. Therefore I must say, a woman who gets upset over another’s opinion on “good” hair, bad hair is simply lacking confidence to some small degree. I’m no one to judge but with the pressures in the rising interest/capital of weave, and the number of stereotypes and stigmas on the womanhood of an “ideal” woman, I think we all can understand another woman’s struggle to accept another’s opinion on the subject of hair. It’s simple, if you do not grab hold of your own mind and thinking, you’re subjected to the whole world defining what’s good or bad for you.

So what’s good hair? It’s simply the hair YOU prefer. Define yourself, for yourself?

P.S. If a man will not date you or accept you for the way you prefer to wear your hair, kick his ass to the curb. With a smile of course! 🙂

My hair expression:


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Sarah Lee

Welcome! My name is Sarah Lee and I'm a Business Strategist and social entrepreneur who loves the outdoors, a good book, and scary movies year round! Throughout this quirky, rich, and mysterious life of mine, I genuinely love to 'share' my experiences as a learning tool. I thought, what better way to track my level of growth than by sharing my experiences and the lessons learned thereof, than in my blog? A wise woman once said, "You are your own masterpiece, therefore, instead of mastering it, master you."

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